We got our first official "walk-in" for Reiki at the store yesterday. Not only that, it was a 'paid for three one hour sessions' walk-in. Hoorah! We've had other people come in but it wasn't a stranger, an unknown person off the street kind of session. It felt like a milestone of accomplishment. I had the feeling that the ball is starting to roll downhill now.
I also had a "walk-in" for a psychic reading, scheduled an appointment for today at 6:00pm. It's a first of sorts as well. Again, I've done lots of readings, even at the store space, but it's the first official one since the store opened. Needless to say, it added to the whole rolling ball feeling. After she left, I stood in the middle of the store and said a prayer of gratitude.
Third point of interest is the new company the husband works for "cut him loose" yesterday from training, put him in a temporary truck and put him on the road. This is good in that he'll start earning a regular paycheck sooner, (rah! rah! rah!) but also will help in his starting to establish more of a routine for being out - coming home. Doing so will go a long way towards creating a more comfortable arrangement for the husband. He likes routine and he likes his home time.
The last thing of interest is a conversation I had with a friend. I won't go into all the details because they are personal to her, but what was of most interest to me is the conversation validated an intuitive knowing I had a while back about her and a friend of hers. Long story short, I "knew" within a couple of months her friend would be revealed in a new light, that what my friend had believed to be a deep, true friendship between the two of them really wouldn't be quite so true. I knew that my friend would be faced with a disappointment and disillusionment in her friend. I hoped I was wrong. I'm sad to say I wasn't.
As I sat and listened to my friend talk, watching her eyes cloud with confusion and doubt about her friend and what to do with the situation, I felt heavy hearted. It's difficult to put faith and trust in someone only to find out later they weren't friend enough to appreciate it, deserve it, respect it, value it. To see past their smoke and mirrors and catch a clear glimpse of their true nature - that they are so completely and totally focused on themselves that you and your friendship is really barely an afterthought, much less anything above lowly place.
But I could also see the flip side of the struggle. As a friend, she still wants to help, was to give of herself, with compassion and sincerity, but it wars with the disillusionment - which breeds a nasty, niggly sense of guilt.Rock = Hard Place.
I tried to be objective and open, to be an ear to listen and a sounding board for the things she needed to say. Then I gave her my thoughts about the situation, my honest opinions and impressions about the friend. (I know the person) Truth is, I feel a certain level of sympathy for her friend. She not in a good place mentally, physically or emotionally. The worst part is her friend won't even see her own accountability for the bad place she is in. She is very much stuck in the "victim" mode. Trust me, it's a big black soul sucking hole of a place. Not easily shed nor walked away from if you've been there awhile. I think her friend has been there a very long time.
Thing is, you can't do anything about where another person is in their life. It's their path they must walk, their own journey. It may be a mildly bumpy road. It may be the equivalent of attempting to scale Mt. Everest with nothing but flip-flops and toothpicks. Sometimes the only way to be a friend is to let them do what they have to do, even if it hurts. It's their life and their lessons to learn or not learn. For my friend, I think this is one of those times.
For me, as I said, it was a sad validation of my intuition. Being right about something isn't always a bowl of strawberries and Cool-Whip. Sometimes being 'psychic' brings information you really prefer not to know about people. You can see some of the bumps in their road and you know you can't do a damn thing about it. You have to stand back and keep your mouth shut because it's a lesson for them to learn. And y'all, that's what life is ... learning the lessons of being human.
Without question, I don't want to see anyone get used or taken advantage of, but I really do hate to see someone's faith and trust in another person get blown out of the water. Losing a job or having your car keel over on the side of the road isn't a positive thing, but the loss of faith in a friend is, well, the pits. It hurts on many levels and isn't easy to deal with. The upside is that my friend has me and other friends who to talk to about it, who understand the situation, and who, above all, really do care about her. If you have to lose one friend it's nice to know there's still a whole herd of them standing right behind you.
So, it's off to work I go this morning ... wonder what today will bring?
Namaste, y'all ...
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Wednesday, May 21, 2008
Y360 blogging memories.
Until November of '07 I blogged on Yahoo 360◦. I really enjoyed that blog. I had lots of friends and we all stayed connected. We'd read each other's posts, make comments and send silly messages to each other. In the relatively short time I was there I had over 10,000 visits to my page. It was a lot of fun. Honestly, it was hard to leave it behind. Why did I? Well, a number of reasons.
One of the things that bugged me was whenever I would leave the link to my blog somewhere it never connected to the most current page. It linked to an old entry and wouldn't update to the newest entry, thus seeming that I never entered anything past October '06. Another thing were the Yahoo gremlins. Sneaky little bastards often ran amok, taking away the comments, poofing my avatar image into the internet void for days, and a host of other irritating technical snafus. Then came the word from Yahoo they were going to close down Y360 and shift everything to another platform. Something like Multiply.com or such. I didn't want the hassle of it. There was also the inevitable slow down of blogging among my friends. Life can get busy, blogging takes a back seat to every day duties.
Another major thing was my own time for blogging. I had opened the blog here with e-blogger, planning to incorporate it into my new website design. It was a pain in the patootie sometimes to blog on one and then update the same info on the other. I wanted to concentrate my efforts into this blog, not divide my attention between the two. Funny, considering how little I've blogged of late. I used to keep my blog page hoppin' over at the Y. I have to say I believe I wrote some really good stuff on that blog. I haven't been much of a story teller here.
Why is that?
One of the things I realize I've really missed about being over at Y360 was the feedback from friends. I'd post a blog and in no time I'd be getting notification in my email this friend or that friend had commented on my post. I loved to read those comments. They made me feel connected, like the stories I was telling were interesting and entertaining to my Y360 friends. It was sort of like having an audience to talk to. It made me work hard to give them something worth reading.
Since being here there's been almost zero in feedback/comments. I know a couple of friends who do read this stuff, but that's about all they do. Read it and move along. No response. No repartee. No rapport. No sense of being a part of a community. I'm just another blogger, blogging amid a gazillion other bloggers in blog land. It's kind of depressing. It's like talking to someone, hear no reply and when you look over to see why not you discover they are asleep. No one heard you.
Now don't get me wrong, blogging isn't about just filling up the comment box. It's a kind of therapy for me. Making myself talk about things in a very public forum. It's putting myself out there on "display", teaching myself to be open when I've spent 95% of my life trying to not be noticed, keep my feelings and emotions tightly wrapped and hidden from view. And, more times than not, those kind of Y360 post would would gets comments of great advice, encouragement, or "I've been there, don't that!" replies. It was comforting, like there were others out there who really understood what I was talking about or going through.
Granted, I don't expect this post to garner any comments anymore than the previous posts to this blog. And, again, it's not what my blogging is really all about. But I will confess I do miss them sometimes. I miss the Y360 family. Contemplating this sparked me to repost my page with MySpace. Of course, I'm not ending this blog, it's my main blog and a part of my website. But MySpace is an active community and there's a good change of making some new friends over there. We'll see how it goes.
Namaste, y'all ...
One of the things that bugged me was whenever I would leave the link to my blog somewhere it never connected to the most current page. It linked to an old entry and wouldn't update to the newest entry, thus seeming that I never entered anything past October '06. Another thing were the Yahoo gremlins. Sneaky little bastards often ran amok, taking away the comments, poofing my avatar image into the internet void for days, and a host of other irritating technical snafus. Then came the word from Yahoo they were going to close down Y360 and shift everything to another platform. Something like Multiply.com or such. I didn't want the hassle of it. There was also the inevitable slow down of blogging among my friends. Life can get busy, blogging takes a back seat to every day duties.
Another major thing was my own time for blogging. I had opened the blog here with e-blogger, planning to incorporate it into my new website design. It was a pain in the patootie sometimes to blog on one and then update the same info on the other. I wanted to concentrate my efforts into this blog, not divide my attention between the two. Funny, considering how little I've blogged of late. I used to keep my blog page hoppin' over at the Y. I have to say I believe I wrote some really good stuff on that blog. I haven't been much of a story teller here.
Why is that?
One of the things I realize I've really missed about being over at Y360 was the feedback from friends. I'd post a blog and in no time I'd be getting notification in my email this friend or that friend had commented on my post. I loved to read those comments. They made me feel connected, like the stories I was telling were interesting and entertaining to my Y360 friends. It was sort of like having an audience to talk to. It made me work hard to give them something worth reading.
Since being here there's been almost zero in feedback/comments. I know a couple of friends who do read this stuff, but that's about all they do. Read it and move along. No response. No repartee. No rapport. No sense of being a part of a community. I'm just another blogger, blogging amid a gazillion other bloggers in blog land. It's kind of depressing. It's like talking to someone, hear no reply and when you look over to see why not you discover they are asleep. No one heard you.
Now don't get me wrong, blogging isn't about just filling up the comment box. It's a kind of therapy for me. Making myself talk about things in a very public forum. It's putting myself out there on "display", teaching myself to be open when I've spent 95% of my life trying to not be noticed, keep my feelings and emotions tightly wrapped and hidden from view. And, more times than not, those kind of Y360 post would would gets comments of great advice, encouragement, or "I've been there, don't that!" replies. It was comforting, like there were others out there who really understood what I was talking about or going through.
Granted, I don't expect this post to garner any comments anymore than the previous posts to this blog. And, again, it's not what my blogging is really all about. But I will confess I do miss them sometimes. I miss the Y360 family. Contemplating this sparked me to repost my page with MySpace. Of course, I'm not ending this blog, it's my main blog and a part of my website. But MySpace is an active community and there's a good change of making some new friends over there. We'll see how it goes.
Namaste, y'all ...
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
The bride wore black.
Wow. Eight years ago today I got married - so y'all, today is my wedding anniversary to the husband. Two things of note: 1) I'm surprised I ever got married and 2) this is the first year we actually remembered our anniversary on the correct date. It's amazing.It's a joke between the husband and I that we have yet to remember to tell each other "happy anniversary" on the date we got married each year. Every stinkin' year we forget. While it's no surprise to me, it is to the husband because he's the sentimental type. He usually remembers that kind of stuff. He remembers to call all of his brothers and sisters, nieces and nephews, and others important individuals on their birthdays, etc.
On the other hand, I do good to remember my own birthday half the time. I have to write the important dates for loved ones on a calendar ... and even then I don't always remember! But you would think I would remember a wedding anniversary, especially my own. Alas, it's slipped my mind - and his - every single year since we tied the knot. Typically, we remember the day after, once it was almost a week after. The only time we got it on the right day was just barely under the wire. It dawned on me around 11:00pm that evening. I called the husband (he was out over the road) and asked him if he knew what day it was. He said, "It's Wednesday." I laughed 'til I nearly peed my pants. Naturally, he was confused about why I thought Wednesday was so damn funny. When I told him it was our anniversary his response was, "Well, F%$#@! We forgot again!" I told him that as long as we got it before midnight it still counted. Once in seven years. Sheesh! Hmmm ... I remembered today, so that's technically twice in eight years. On a roll.
I guess it's not the date that is important so much as the fact we did the deed, and we're still married. Like I said in note #1, I'm surprised I got married at all. I never really planned on it. Given my life at the time, I was sure I never would. Hell, I didn't think I would ever date again. It was a rough time in my life when I met the husband. Hooking up with someone was the last thing on my mind. As a matter of fact, one of the very first conversations the husband and I had was about the man and the break-up I was going through. It was awful. I was devastated, an emotional train wreck. I won't go into all those nasty details. Suffice it to say romance wasn't high on my priority list.The other joke between the husband an I is telling people how we met. The internet. I call him my ebay bargain and he refers to me as his email bride. When I first met the husband I was suffering severe insomnia. I couldn't sleep, couldn't shut off my brain. Several months before I had quit my job, sold everything I owned, moved back home and was living in my sister's garage. I had very little savings, was struggling to start out as an artist, and believed I had lost the love of my life. I was miserable and lonely in a way I had never felt before. It was especially disturbing because, until then, I had always handled being along very well. I like it. I needed lots of "me" time. Still do. In contrast, I also wanted to keep the world at bay. I was hiding in a corner and licking my wounds.
In those wee hours of the morning while my sister and her family slept at night I surfed the internet. Sometimes I would talk to some of my friends from where I had lived in chat rooms because my sister hadn't installed Messenger - and I didn't think to do it, either. I made new friends in the chat rooms, too. It was interesting to talk to people from all over the world and all walks of life. It gave me a form of 'company' yet kept the world at a distance. Sometimes, when I was having a really bad day, I would go into the chat rooms and just watch the conversations of others. That's how I met the husband.
I was sitting at the computer, watching but not participating, when he came into the room. Typically, when you entered you got asked the standard questions: Age, Sex, Location. When someone asked him I noticed he responded he was from Houston, Texas. Someone asked him what he did and replied he was a truck driver. I perked up a little at that. A couple of weeks earlier I had chatted with another guy who was also a truck driver from Houston. I thought "what are the odds???" I asked this new guy if he had heard of the trucking company the other guy worked for. He said yes, he'd heard of it, and we started chatting. I asked about his company and found out he was online because he worked the "late shift". He delivered frozen goods to places like Taco Bell and Burger King. Since he delivered either late after closing or before they opened he was often up and awake in the wee hours, too. Anyway, I guess it was around an hour later or so I got finally sleepy, signed off and went to bed.
The next time I got online and went into a chat room he popped in and said hello. He said he'd enjoyed talking to me and had added me to his "friends" list, thus being able to tell when I came online. I didn't think much about it because I had done the same with my own friends as well as the new friends I was making via the internet. We wound up chatting for awhile that evening about insignificant stuff. I think it was when he asked about my being back home that I lost it. I found myself sitting there bawling like a baby. I couldn't see the computer screen to type, to upset to keep typing anyway, so I just shut it down and went to my room. I didn't even realize I hadn't told him good-bye. I didn't get back online for a few days, but when I did he was there, asking what had happened. I told him the whole sob story. He told me his sob story about his ex-wife. Almost every evening afterwards we would chat for awhile, talking about our lives, our situations. We became friends.
In January 2000, after about seven months of chatting, turned letters, turned phone calls, I hopped a Greyhound and went to Texas to visit. He hadn't been with his current trucking company long enough to have any built up vacation time to hang out with me, but I was okay with that. The plan was to muck around on my own during the day while he slept, we'd have dinner or whatever in the evening before he'd go to work, then I'd hang out some more 'til he was able to come back the next day/evening. I really needed the time away from the cocoon of my sister's garage room where I was staying, from my sad heart, and the stress of trying to start my art career.
A couple of weeks before I got on the bus he called. Surprise news. He'd turned in his two weeks' notice to his employer, lined up another job here in North Carolina and he was going to come back with me ... or rather, I'd be coming back with him and not on a bus. His intent was to get married. I was surprised, really surprised. He'd taken an awfully big leap of faith. But for the life of me I couldn't think of a reason to say no. Despite the fact that we had never met in person, I still knew him. Better yet, he knew me. We had talked about things, been open and honest about things, shared things that people who've been married for years never share or discuss. He felt comfortable to me, and I really liked that. Plus, he had a black cowboy hat and a goatee. And really, what woman can resist a cowboy???
Ended up my plan didn't go according to plan. We spent our time together seeing stuff around Houston, visiting family he had there, and then drove up to New Mexico to meet his mother, Inez, and stepfather, Henry. Freaky. She welcomed me as her new daughter, made me stacks of tortillas and called me "Mija" (Spanish slang for daughter). Henry wasn't any different. He called me "Mija", too. We got back to North Carolina on a Saturday night late. Hung around my sister's on Sunday, recovering from the trip. On Monday, he started his new job. A month later we moved into a rental place with the intention of getting married as soon as finances allowed. Two and a half months later we were hitched. Yes, I did wear black - proof in the photos. A year later we moved into our own home.
I can honestly admit our marriage has never been about romance, it's been about being friends. All right, maybe for the husband it's had a more romantic twist, but not for me. He loves me in that "goo" that is typical of love relationships. My heart has never fully recovered from "the man" before the husband. I married for comfort, for security, stability. Practical reasons. Before you say that's harsh and unfair to him, understand he knew exactly what he was getting into. I told him the unvarnished truth, upfront and without sugarcoating anything. And I do love him. Maybe not the way I did "the man", but it's still a real, honest love. I care about his welfare, I care about his happiness, I care about him as a person and as my husband. It may not be what most people call a marriage, but it works for us and that's what counts.
This morning, I actually remembered it was our anniversary. Around 9:00am I called him on his cell and as soon as he answered he yelled, "Happy Anniversary!" I yelled it back and we both laughed at our goofiness. We both remembered! He was busy getting ready to make a stop so I let him get off the phone and back to work. The point was made. I'm sure when he calls later this evening we'll laugh about it some more.
Happy Anniversary to us!
Namaste, y'all ...
Monday, May 19, 2008
Shell shocked, and it's still Monday.
Monday, continued ..... holy crap!
It has come home to me, literally, that big things come in very small packages. Something as seemingly innocuous as a FedEx envelop can send your day on a straight path to Hell. And it comes with a friendly greeting and a smile.
What am I talking about?
I was sitting there on the sofa, taking a short breather after rearranging the bedroom furniture, when I hear the crunch of gravel from wheels coming down my drive. Interesting. Slightly irritating. I'm not expecting anyone. I look out the back window and see a big white FedEx van. Hmmm. I haven't ordered anything. I go to the door, step out onto the porch, get the "Hello ma'am!" greeting. I acknowledge with my own Hi ya'! I wait while he punches in the numbers into the handset, chit-chatting about the nice weather today. He hands me an envelop and bids me a good day. I say bye and go back in the house.
Quick zip of the pull tab, open the envelop, take out papers, read, stand in the middle of the living room feeling slightly nauseous. It's a letter from the company my husband had been working for announcing they are not only closing the three terminals we already knew of. They are shutting down the entire company. Effective today. My head instantly started to hurt.
Why should I care? The husband has already found another job. Well, yeah, but Jevic was supposed to be paying the drivers from the three terminals, with health benefits, until June 2nd. In the blink of an eye that just got shot in the proverbial ass. Both barrels. Dear Employee, we've just screwed you out of a couple of paychecks you were counting on. Have a nice day.
I don't know about the rest of you, but times here at Chez Martinez are tight. All paychecks and/or income are necessary. I like to have food. My vehicles like fuel. My assorted debts like to be paid. Unfortunately, I'm not a month ahead on all my bills the way I was this time last year. Again, things have been tight. (okay yeah, I was the idiot who bought nasty expensive yarn last year but that's not totally relevant at the moment). The cost of living has increased while the income as slightly declined because of the state of the economy. Lots of people out there know exactly what I'm talking about. Bills get paid but not much left to pay extra all the time.
What concerns me at the moment is the income from the husband's new job is still "training level income". I have no idea how much he will be making over the next couple of weeks, nor am I certain about the overall income situation to begin with. Trucking incomes are not constant like a typical 40 hr. week job. You get what you get according to what you drive. It fluctuates and varies week to week. With the new company, it will now be every two weeks instead of weekly. We don't know for certain how long he'll be with his trainer and when he'll get his own truck to start 'really' earning income.
The reiki store is not an income venture at present, nor do I expect it to be for awhile. Artwork income isn't bill paying now either. Despite having a small amount of savings stuck back, it's still not a pleasant situation at the moment. I'm also not looking forward to the husband's reaction when he calls this evening and I tell him the news. It will only add stress to what is already a stressful 'new job' situation for him.
No y'all, today has not been an altogether nice day as I thought it might be. And it looks like that lovely Stimulus check and our unexpected bonus of a state/federal tax form amendment filing will go for bills and not anything fun, that's for damn sure. The husband's going to have to wait for the computer stuff for his keyboard as well. Blah!, he's going to be really snarly about that, too.
And one of the side effects of this whole thing (husband's job & financial issues) is the separation I'm feeling spiritually. Surprisingly, it hasn't affected my readings for others at all. I say lots of prayers of gratitude for that, you can be sure!!! What I mean though is the connection for me personally. I realize it's a temporary state of affairs. I realize the cause. I realize it's technically my own internal chatter of worrying about things that creates the block. I got it. What I don't got is a solution that's quick and straightforwardly flips the switch back to the on position. And, yes, this creates more worry and stress. Treadmill + squirrel + nut.
I feel like an idiot. I really do. I'm supposed to be well connected to the Creative Source, to my Guides, and yet I feel insecure and full of doubt about them. I see them at a distance and I wonder if they really are who I've believed they are all this time. I guess that doesn't make much sense to most of you. In a way, it doesn't make sense to me either. This is even more confusing because of a relatively recent addition/connect to a major Guide. Being connected to my Guides is vitally important to me.
Way back when I had my Y360 blog (which I still miss, BTW) I posted this about Spirit Guides. *For those who have read it, bear with it again ......
Kali's perspective on a the subject of Spirit Guides, Guardian Angels and such ... *Please remember this is MY take on things, entirely what I get from the spirit world. Your own experience may be vastly different because Spirit moves differently for different people. You gotta' go with what works for you personally.*
So, get yourselves comfy folks, 'cause here we go ...
Much like our own military, spiritual/celestial entities have a hierarchy. Like a Marine rank and file. You've got your enlisted guys, Private - grunts - soldiers who fight on the front lines - all the way up to you're 4-Star General, the Big Cheese. Each exist on different vibrational levels or dimensions within the whole of the spiritual/celestial system. They also have varying ranks within their own particular level, so to speak. Think Sergeant, Staff Sergeant, Gunnery Sergeant, Master Sergeant, Sergeant Major, etc.
Those whom I'll call Earth-Bound Entities (EB's) are what you would probably call ghosts. They are the most closely connected to this earthly vibrational level - they are the equivalent of Private. They haven't yet realized they've passed from earthly form to spiritual form, for whatever reason. Haunted houses, etc.
Next along are the spirits of your Grandmother Rosie, your Aunt Edna, your Uncle Bob, etc. (Private First Class) They are the easiest to connect to when channeling because their vibrational level is still, in a way, earth-bound. They know they've passed, moved up the vibrational scale, but they still feel a connection to the loved ones they left behind. They are the ones who greet you when you cross over as well.
Then you've got your Guardian Angels = Sergeants. They can still materialize and appear as humans, or even as animals. Lots of people have stories about coming in contact with a mysterious person who somehow 'saved their life' or helped them in a profound way. They are your closest spiritual ally, with you from the first breath of your earthly existence to your last. A kind of celestial 'soul buddy'. Every single person has one, even if they do know acknowledge them. They protect you in this life.
Gate Keepers - Lieutenants - are most known to those who, like myself, are Mediums. They 'guard the door' between earth and spirit. They are the big burly guys who'll toss you out on your ass if you make an unwanted, drunkenly groping pass at the waitress over at Billy-Bob's Road House. They watch your back. They protect you from negative EB's and help you raise your own vibrational level to channel higher level entities.
Spirit Guides are unusual creatures and fall somewhere in around the rank of Captain. They have, as ALL entities do, distinct personalities and play individual, specialized roles in the lives of the humans they work with. They or may not have ever lived as humans, though often they are beings who have indeed walked in this earthly dimension at one time or another. They usually have lived a life with their 'assigned' humans as a friend, family member, or some other close acquaintance. They are, in a form, very similar to 'soul mates', cosmic buddies who repeatedly share the course of our lives. They work with us on our life's path. They encourage, guide, and care for us all the days of our existence ... both in physical form and spiritual form. Occasionally they come and go through your life, new ones coming in, as you learn certain lessons, others move out. It is not unusual for a particular Guide to work with several humans at once. They exist in a vibrational level that enables them to "be in two places at one time" in a way.
Angels and Archangels - Michael, Gabriel, Raphael, Metatron and so forth are the Majors. While they do not take human form, they still greatly influence human life. Good ol' Michael is one of my own Guides and I can assure you, he is quite a character. But I'll talk more about him at another time. Often these are the ones who channel information through a particular individual, like Seth channeled through Jane Roberts. Again, they too have a kind of hierarchy within their own vibrational level. They are important in that they carry messages for the whole of existence as we know it, and existence outside of our perceived vibrational level and dimension. And they are somewhat like cosmic gate keepers between the higher spiritual levels.
As we step up the celestial ladder, you get into those some call the Ascended Masters. These are your Colonels. Think Buddha, Jesus, Shiva, Kwan Yin, and so forth. They are the beings whom humans have called Gods and Goddess through the ages. They have become self-realized (meaning they have achieved a complete and indivisible union with the Divine Source) and can come and go from the earthly plane to the celestial plane without the humanistic birth/death cycle. They "sit at the right hand" of the Creator. They are our ultimate teachers and guides. They embody the cosmic lessons, ie: Jesus = love; Buddha = enlightenment; Kwan Yin = compassion; etc. They work with us for our highest spiritual evolution and walking our own path toward achieving self-realization.
Whew! Now that we’ve established the cosmic hierarchy as Kali knows it to be ....
Today, a few of my own Spirit Guides are yammering to be introduced. I think they’ve been plotting this behind my back for awhile. And they’ve been as giggly as schoolgirls all morning.
I don't know about yours (unless I tune in, of course) but mine have a wicked sense of humor. They are prone to dishing out a spiritual thump on the head on occasion. But most importantly, they love to laugh ... sometimes with me, sometimes at me. I'm not at all sure I'm likin' that being laughed at aspect, but I do see their point. I can be rather dense, and when I finally clue in to an important message, it's inevitably a "Duh!" kind of moment.
Unfortunately, I can't say that I know ALL of my Guides very well. What I do know is that for some inexplicable reason, there's a whole chorus line of them hanging around. Some stand way back in the peripheral of my psychic vision, some get right up in my face. Those are the ones I do know, the up close and personal ones. I know their names. I've 'seen' their faces. I 'hear' their voices. We communicate telepathically, all the time. *NOTE* Guides can get kinda' pushy, too, when they want something, just so y'all know. My closest Spirit Guides are Izeel, Abeal, Andrew and Murium. The Four Musketeers. They are my spiritual comrades, so to speak. They have a preference for nice long talks when I'm in bed getting ready to fall asleep. I suppose that’s the time I’m most receptive, most relaxed, and not so much ‘in my own head’. They take advantage of that.
They, as I said, are specialized. Izeel is the most vocal of the group. With his appearance, he gets this whole hippie/Jesus thing going. Y’all know, picture Robert Powell in Jesus of Nazareth with a tie-dyed robe on. Really nice. He’s the one I take deeply personal questions and concerns to. He holds my emotional side and my intuitive side. He is my comfort zone, my big fuzzy blanket.
Abeal has short, light golden brownish-red curly hair, soft gray eyes, beard and mustache. He has a vaguely Irish look about him and he likes to wear those cable-knit fisherman’s sweaters. He holds my intellectual side. He’s technical, analytical, yet in an oddly informal way. He’s who works with me at the computer or when I do graphic design stuff. He’s much like a wonderful Uncle, gentle, but you've got to respect him.
Andrew is tall, lean, with a mop of always messed up black hair. He has sparkly clear blue eyes and he loves to laugh. He loves to hear me laugh as well. He holds my childish, humorous side. He will sometimes break out dancing, and he moves through existence as if it’s always a celebration. He likes blue jeans, white t-shirts and high-top Converse sneakers ... worn out, untied and floppy. All he needs is a '57 Chevy and a pack of cigarettes rolled up in his shirt sleeve.
Murium is whom I often call Muse. She is my artistic guide. She holds my imagination, my creativity, my self-expression. She’s a warrior with paint. She has beautifully long blonde hair, an angelic face, a sculptor’s dream. She is elegance, romance, magic and mystery. She is the nymph men have sought to accurately paint for hundreds of years ... and they always fall short of capturing her beauty. Her eyes are violet/gray. She rarely speaks, but makes her presence known just the same. She holds my hand when I paint, as if she were doing the work and not I.
But another interesting character is my Gate Keeper, Nanna. Grand-motherly in appearance with a soft cloud of white hair. She, like Andrew, loves to laugh and she likes to pat me on the head. She is there when I fall asleep, when I channel or do any psychic work, and she’s also very fond of hanging around when I cook. Her call sign is chocolate chip cookies. If I, out of the blue, suddenly think about chocolate chip cookies you can bet Nanna is near.
This morning I was standing at the kitchen sink and I had a “Duh!” moment. I was thinking about the chocolate chip cookies I had made last weekend, how I had eaten a couple every day even though I really wasn’t craving cookies in the least bit. I realized I had mistaken the spontaneous “Oh, I think I’ll go in the kitchen and make some chocolate chip cookies!” moment I had last Saturday for just that ... an urge to make cookies. In reality is was Nanna trying to get my attention. Why? Because she knew I was getting ready to ‘move up a vibrational level’ and it was going to be a kind of psychic overload.
It has come home to me, literally, that big things come in very small packages. Something as seemingly innocuous as a FedEx envelop can send your day on a straight path to Hell. And it comes with a friendly greeting and a smile.
What am I talking about?
I was sitting there on the sofa, taking a short breather after rearranging the bedroom furniture, when I hear the crunch of gravel from wheels coming down my drive. Interesting. Slightly irritating. I'm not expecting anyone. I look out the back window and see a big white FedEx van. Hmmm. I haven't ordered anything. I go to the door, step out onto the porch, get the "Hello ma'am!" greeting. I acknowledge with my own Hi ya'! I wait while he punches in the numbers into the handset, chit-chatting about the nice weather today. He hands me an envelop and bids me a good day. I say bye and go back in the house.
Quick zip of the pull tab, open the envelop, take out papers, read, stand in the middle of the living room feeling slightly nauseous. It's a letter from the company my husband had been working for announcing they are not only closing the three terminals we already knew of. They are shutting down the entire company. Effective today. My head instantly started to hurt.
Why should I care? The husband has already found another job. Well, yeah, but Jevic was supposed to be paying the drivers from the three terminals, with health benefits, until June 2nd. In the blink of an eye that just got shot in the proverbial ass. Both barrels. Dear Employee, we've just screwed you out of a couple of paychecks you were counting on. Have a nice day.
I don't know about the rest of you, but times here at Chez Martinez are tight. All paychecks and/or income are necessary. I like to have food. My vehicles like fuel. My assorted debts like to be paid. Unfortunately, I'm not a month ahead on all my bills the way I was this time last year. Again, things have been tight. (okay yeah, I was the idiot who bought nasty expensive yarn last year but that's not totally relevant at the moment). The cost of living has increased while the income as slightly declined because of the state of the economy. Lots of people out there know exactly what I'm talking about. Bills get paid but not much left to pay extra all the time.
What concerns me at the moment is the income from the husband's new job is still "training level income". I have no idea how much he will be making over the next couple of weeks, nor am I certain about the overall income situation to begin with. Trucking incomes are not constant like a typical 40 hr. week job. You get what you get according to what you drive. It fluctuates and varies week to week. With the new company, it will now be every two weeks instead of weekly. We don't know for certain how long he'll be with his trainer and when he'll get his own truck to start 'really' earning income.
The reiki store is not an income venture at present, nor do I expect it to be for awhile. Artwork income isn't bill paying now either. Despite having a small amount of savings stuck back, it's still not a pleasant situation at the moment. I'm also not looking forward to the husband's reaction when he calls this evening and I tell him the news. It will only add stress to what is already a stressful 'new job' situation for him.
No y'all, today has not been an altogether nice day as I thought it might be. And it looks like that lovely Stimulus check and our unexpected bonus of a state/federal tax form amendment filing will go for bills and not anything fun, that's for damn sure. The husband's going to have to wait for the computer stuff for his keyboard as well. Blah!, he's going to be really snarly about that, too.
And one of the side effects of this whole thing (husband's job & financial issues) is the separation I'm feeling spiritually. Surprisingly, it hasn't affected my readings for others at all. I say lots of prayers of gratitude for that, you can be sure!!! What I mean though is the connection for me personally. I realize it's a temporary state of affairs. I realize the cause. I realize it's technically my own internal chatter of worrying about things that creates the block. I got it. What I don't got is a solution that's quick and straightforwardly flips the switch back to the on position. And, yes, this creates more worry and stress. Treadmill + squirrel + nut.
I feel like an idiot. I really do. I'm supposed to be well connected to the Creative Source, to my Guides, and yet I feel insecure and full of doubt about them. I see them at a distance and I wonder if they really are who I've believed they are all this time. I guess that doesn't make much sense to most of you. In a way, it doesn't make sense to me either. This is even more confusing because of a relatively recent addition/connect to a major Guide. Being connected to my Guides is vitally important to me.
Way back when I had my Y360 blog (which I still miss, BTW) I posted this about Spirit Guides. *For those who have read it, bear with it again ......
_________________________________
Kali's perspective on a the subject of Spirit Guides, Guardian Angels and such ... *Please remember this is MY take on things, entirely what I get from the spirit world. Your own experience may be vastly different because Spirit moves differently for different people. You gotta' go with what works for you personally.*
So, get yourselves comfy folks, 'cause here we go ...
Much like our own military, spiritual/celestial entities have a hierarchy. Like a Marine rank and file. You've got your enlisted guys, Private - grunts - soldiers who fight on the front lines - all the way up to you're 4-Star General, the Big Cheese. Each exist on different vibrational levels or dimensions within the whole of the spiritual/celestial system. They also have varying ranks within their own particular level, so to speak. Think Sergeant, Staff Sergeant, Gunnery Sergeant, Master Sergeant, Sergeant Major, etc.
Those whom I'll call Earth-Bound Entities (EB's) are what you would probably call ghosts. They are the most closely connected to this earthly vibrational level - they are the equivalent of Private. They haven't yet realized they've passed from earthly form to spiritual form, for whatever reason. Haunted houses, etc.
Next along are the spirits of your Grandmother Rosie, your Aunt Edna, your Uncle Bob, etc. (Private First Class) They are the easiest to connect to when channeling because their vibrational level is still, in a way, earth-bound. They know they've passed, moved up the vibrational scale, but they still feel a connection to the loved ones they left behind. They are the ones who greet you when you cross over as well.
Then you've got your Guardian Angels = Sergeants. They can still materialize and appear as humans, or even as animals. Lots of people have stories about coming in contact with a mysterious person who somehow 'saved their life' or helped them in a profound way. They are your closest spiritual ally, with you from the first breath of your earthly existence to your last. A kind of celestial 'soul buddy'. Every single person has one, even if they do know acknowledge them. They protect you in this life.
Gate Keepers - Lieutenants - are most known to those who, like myself, are Mediums. They 'guard the door' between earth and spirit. They are the big burly guys who'll toss you out on your ass if you make an unwanted, drunkenly groping pass at the waitress over at Billy-Bob's Road House. They watch your back. They protect you from negative EB's and help you raise your own vibrational level to channel higher level entities.
Spirit Guides are unusual creatures and fall somewhere in around the rank of Captain. They have, as ALL entities do, distinct personalities and play individual, specialized roles in the lives of the humans they work with. They or may not have ever lived as humans, though often they are beings who have indeed walked in this earthly dimension at one time or another. They usually have lived a life with their 'assigned' humans as a friend, family member, or some other close acquaintance. They are, in a form, very similar to 'soul mates', cosmic buddies who repeatedly share the course of our lives. They work with us on our life's path. They encourage, guide, and care for us all the days of our existence ... both in physical form and spiritual form. Occasionally they come and go through your life, new ones coming in, as you learn certain lessons, others move out. It is not unusual for a particular Guide to work with several humans at once. They exist in a vibrational level that enables them to "be in two places at one time" in a way.
Angels and Archangels - Michael, Gabriel, Raphael, Metatron and so forth are the Majors. While they do not take human form, they still greatly influence human life. Good ol' Michael is one of my own Guides and I can assure you, he is quite a character. But I'll talk more about him at another time. Often these are the ones who channel information through a particular individual, like Seth channeled through Jane Roberts. Again, they too have a kind of hierarchy within their own vibrational level. They are important in that they carry messages for the whole of existence as we know it, and existence outside of our perceived vibrational level and dimension. And they are somewhat like cosmic gate keepers between the higher spiritual levels.
As we step up the celestial ladder, you get into those some call the Ascended Masters. These are your Colonels. Think Buddha, Jesus, Shiva, Kwan Yin, and so forth. They are the beings whom humans have called Gods and Goddess through the ages. They have become self-realized (meaning they have achieved a complete and indivisible union with the Divine Source) and can come and go from the earthly plane to the celestial plane without the humanistic birth/death cycle. They "sit at the right hand" of the Creator. They are our ultimate teachers and guides. They embody the cosmic lessons, ie: Jesus = love; Buddha = enlightenment; Kwan Yin = compassion; etc. They work with us for our highest spiritual evolution and walking our own path toward achieving self-realization.
Whew! Now that we’ve established the cosmic hierarchy as Kali knows it to be ....
Today, a few of my own Spirit Guides are yammering to be introduced. I think they’ve been plotting this behind my back for awhile. And they’ve been as giggly as schoolgirls all morning.
I don't know about yours (unless I tune in, of course) but mine have a wicked sense of humor. They are prone to dishing out a spiritual thump on the head on occasion. But most importantly, they love to laugh ... sometimes with me, sometimes at me. I'm not at all sure I'm likin' that being laughed at aspect, but I do see their point. I can be rather dense, and when I finally clue in to an important message, it's inevitably a "Duh!" kind of moment.
Unfortunately, I can't say that I know ALL of my Guides very well. What I do know is that for some inexplicable reason, there's a whole chorus line of them hanging around. Some stand way back in the peripheral of my psychic vision, some get right up in my face. Those are the ones I do know, the up close and personal ones. I know their names. I've 'seen' their faces. I 'hear' their voices. We communicate telepathically, all the time. *NOTE* Guides can get kinda' pushy, too, when they want something, just so y'all know. My closest Spirit Guides are Izeel, Abeal, Andrew and Murium. The Four Musketeers. They are my spiritual comrades, so to speak. They have a preference for nice long talks when I'm in bed getting ready to fall asleep. I suppose that’s the time I’m most receptive, most relaxed, and not so much ‘in my own head’. They take advantage of that.
They, as I said, are specialized. Izeel is the most vocal of the group. With his appearance, he gets this whole hippie/Jesus thing going. Y’all know, picture Robert Powell in Jesus of Nazareth with a tie-dyed robe on. Really nice. He’s the one I take deeply personal questions and concerns to. He holds my emotional side and my intuitive side. He is my comfort zone, my big fuzzy blanket.
Abeal has short, light golden brownish-red curly hair, soft gray eyes, beard and mustache. He has a vaguely Irish look about him and he likes to wear those cable-knit fisherman’s sweaters. He holds my intellectual side. He’s technical, analytical, yet in an oddly informal way. He’s who works with me at the computer or when I do graphic design stuff. He’s much like a wonderful Uncle, gentle, but you've got to respect him.
Andrew is tall, lean, with a mop of always messed up black hair. He has sparkly clear blue eyes and he loves to laugh. He loves to hear me laugh as well. He holds my childish, humorous side. He will sometimes break out dancing, and he moves through existence as if it’s always a celebration. He likes blue jeans, white t-shirts and high-top Converse sneakers ... worn out, untied and floppy. All he needs is a '57 Chevy and a pack of cigarettes rolled up in his shirt sleeve.
Murium is whom I often call Muse. She is my artistic guide. She holds my imagination, my creativity, my self-expression. She’s a warrior with paint. She has beautifully long blonde hair, an angelic face, a sculptor’s dream. She is elegance, romance, magic and mystery. She is the nymph men have sought to accurately paint for hundreds of years ... and they always fall short of capturing her beauty. Her eyes are violet/gray. She rarely speaks, but makes her presence known just the same. She holds my hand when I paint, as if she were doing the work and not I.
But another interesting character is my Gate Keeper, Nanna. Grand-motherly in appearance with a soft cloud of white hair. She, like Andrew, loves to laugh and she likes to pat me on the head. She is there when I fall asleep, when I channel or do any psychic work, and she’s also very fond of hanging around when I cook. Her call sign is chocolate chip cookies. If I, out of the blue, suddenly think about chocolate chip cookies you can bet Nanna is near.
This morning I was standing at the kitchen sink and I had a “Duh!” moment. I was thinking about the chocolate chip cookies I had made last weekend, how I had eaten a couple every day even though I really wasn’t craving cookies in the least bit. I realized I had mistaken the spontaneous “Oh, I think I’ll go in the kitchen and make some chocolate chip cookies!” moment I had last Saturday for just that ... an urge to make cookies. In reality is was Nanna trying to get my attention. Why? Because she knew I was getting ready to ‘move up a vibrational level’ and it was going to be a kind of psychic overload.
_________________________________
So what's the point of all that? It's a reminder for me of how well I was once "in touch" with my Guides. How I talked to them all day and into the evening until I fell asleep. How I felt them with me so clearly I could almost see them in the physical. I was really connected.
For the past several weeks that feeling just isn't there and I'm at a loss with it. I miss them, miss that connection terribly. When I try to connect for anything other than a client reading it just feels off, distant and clouded. To be honest, it's more than troubling, it's really wigging me out. I don't like it. Not at all.
What to do? For now, it's go fix something to eat (because I tend to not eat when I'm upset or stressed), watch a movie and knit something.
Again, Namaste y'all ...
So what's the point of all that? It's a reminder for me of how well I was once "in touch" with my Guides. How I talked to them all day and into the evening until I fell asleep. How I felt them with me so clearly I could almost see them in the physical. I was really connected.
For the past several weeks that feeling just isn't there and I'm at a loss with it. I miss them, miss that connection terribly. When I try to connect for anything other than a client reading it just feels off, distant and clouded. To be honest, it's more than troubling, it's really wigging me out. I don't like it. Not at all.
What to do? For now, it's go fix something to eat (because I tend to not eat when I'm upset or stressed), watch a movie and knit something.
Again, Namaste y'all ...
It's Monday. One of my two days away from the store. I should be in the studio, blissfully swishing paint around on a canvas or something. Instead, I'm sitting here wondering what the dickins' to do with myself. My options are:
Decisions, decisions.
I think I'll go have a cup of coffee first.
Namaste y'all ...
- Clean the house, which I confess I've been shamefully neglectful of doing of late.
- Yard work to attempt to fight the ever expanding weed field my "yard" is fast becoming.
- Write blog post, which I think is fairly obvious is happening right now.
- Stare at the walls. No need to elaborate.
- Paint something, which I'm inclined to do but having a dilemma on subject matter.
- Work on one of my five in-progress knitting projects.
- Read one of the two dozen books stacked up on the corner of the table.
- Surf the internet, expanding my mind with such Earth shattering news as Brangelina expecting twins. Y'all know how important it is to keep up with celebrity gossip and tabloid tidbits.
- Something creative, "something" being in the catagory of sewing a new pocketbook, etc.
- Business related paper work.
Decisions, decisions.
I think I'll go have a cup of coffee first.
Namaste y'all ...
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
This time I have a photo of art. Imagine that!
Okay, I'm actually giving you a double whammy with photos. The first is an image of what I see when I'm sitting here at my computer with the door open. Aren't they just beautiful??? They make me happy with their varying shades of bright to butter yellow. As each bloom fades it will turn an even paler shade of yellow, almost white. It's a party of yellow! The only down side is they aren't as fragrant as they are prolific. Ah well, I can live with just the visual enjoyment.
Second photo is of the "abstract" I've been working on. As you can see, and as I mentioned before, it's turned out to be more of a landscape than an abstract. I won't even bother to show the first failed attempt. Suffice it to say that while it's interesting, it's not what I had in mind at all. It's currently living in the studio closet. It's just going to have to stay hidden until inspiration strikes.
As for this damn 'landscape', I'm stuck. Now, the husband thinks it's lovely. That's because he can tell what it is ... a field of bluebonnets. I'm still training him about art. He's making progress, sometimes even surprises me, but this time around I'm not exactly happy with his reaction to it. I'm not trying to make it obvious that it's a field of bluebonnets, ya' know? Sadly, he's correct. There's not much question about subject matter. You don't have to think about it. You don't have to use your imagination. It's boring. I don't like it.
What to do?
Any suggestions??????
Namaste y'all ...
Second photo is of the "abstract" I've been working on. As you can see, and as I mentioned before, it's turned out to be more of a landscape than an abstract. I won't even bother to show the first failed attempt. Suffice it to say that while it's interesting, it's not what I had in mind at all. It's currently living in the studio closet. It's just going to have to stay hidden until inspiration strikes.
As for this damn 'landscape', I'm stuck. Now, the husband thinks it's lovely. That's because he can tell what it is ... a field of bluebonnets. I'm still training him about art. He's making progress, sometimes even surprises me, but this time around I'm not exactly happy with his reaction to it. I'm not trying to make it obvious that it's a field of bluebonnets, ya' know? Sadly, he's correct. There's not much question about subject matter. You don't have to think about it. You don't have to use your imagination. It's boring. I don't like it.
What to do?
Any suggestions??????
Namaste y'all ...
Monday, May 12, 2008
Eating cake, yarn and an empty house.
My, my, how time flies. Okay, not. This has been the longest two weeks in recored history. But at long last the husband is finally gone back to work! Starts his new job with Enterprise this morning. Left at 5:30 am, the butt crack of dawn, and the house is mine again for at least the next five days. The cat and I are sitting here at the computer with our coffee and a house full of blissful silence and emptiness. All is right with our little world.
Don't get me wrong. I do love the husband. He's my husband, after all. But I've moaned and groaned many times about how much it wigs me out to have someone else in the house all the time. I'm used to being here alone, quiet and alone. I like it. I need it. My heart of hearts is a solitary one 3/4 of the time. Even having the husband occupied back in his studio for hours at a time doesn't keep me from being aware there is another person in the house. The energy changes. I'm aware of his presence at all times. It's nerve wrecking. Sort of like a doctor being 'on call' and never knowing for sure just when that damned beeper 's gonna' go off. Ah well, the next five days are mine. And yes, I'm giggling about that lovely little fact.
The store's been open for eleven days now. While I can't say we've been very busy I can say we have had some business. When our newspaper article hits the press I'm sure it will pick up considerably. Spreading the word. I'm looking forward to the day when we're busy enough to hire someone to run the counter while Paul and I spend our time doing Reiki sessions all day. Or I'm doing readings. I'm looking forward to having other types of services like having a massage therapist or acupuncturist, etc. I'm looking forward to offering classes such as yoga or meditation or tai chi. I'm looking forward to the retail section of the store being full of more nice things and making lots of sales on a daily basis. I see it all in my mind's eye and I feel good about it. Even with the state of the economy and life being a bit chaotic now, I still feel very positive about our store and it's success. It's going to be wonderful.
Speaking of wonderful things ... I'm knitting up a lovely meditations stole to sell in the store. It's a delicate angora/silk lace weight yarn in a dusty lavender color. When it's finished I'm going to stitch little crystal beads on it. Yeah, there is a way to attach the beads while you are knitting but I didn't think about it until I'd already started. This particular on is a basic garter stitch on large needles. Creates the illusion of lace without the complication of actually knitting a real lace pattern.
But it's making me brave .....
I made a trip to Asheville to AC Moore Crafts and bought some other yarns for shawls/stoles. While I was there I found a book, Wrapped in Comfort by Alison Jeppson Hyde, which completely and totally snagged my soul. Holy schmoly! I am so hooked. The shawls are amazing. They are so delicate and feminine. I want one of each. Yes, I'm aware that's a rather hysterical statement coming from me. But believe me, these shawls are simply dreamy. Granted, I'm not quite ready to jump into knitting one up just yet but I've been on the net looking for the yarn for the one I do intend to make. Handmaiden Yarn. In my humble opinion, it ranks right up there with chocolate. It's nasty expensive, too. Fortunately the shawl I want to knit only requires one skein. Whew!
Making any one of them would gear me up for this frothy bit of yarnage ... Best of Interweave Knits. *Note image on cover.* I have the pattern in one of my issues of Interweave Knits. When I got that magazine I sat and stared at that shawl with my mouth hanging open. It's a beautiful piece of work. It was a vague, distant thought in my little brain that I would ever dare to attempt such an accomplishment as knitting up a lace shawl. Intimidating is an understatement. At the time, I was still only dreaming of making my sweater. Ya' know, I really think knitting that sweater caused something in my cranial cavity to snap loose. Half way through I was envisioning piles of sweaters, things with cables and fancy-pants stitches, big and snuggly afghans, socks and thick footies. And, yes, even daring to think of knitting lace. My knit-freak kicked in, or on, or whatever. Gah!
So, now I'm on the rampage of knitting prayer/meditation shawls/stoles for the store. I don't know that I'm going to be able to part with them after I knit them. Oy! That's a depressing thought. Maybe I'll use the Handmaiden yarns for ones for me and other yarns for the ones for the store. Yeah! Excellent. Cake and eat it, too.
Namaste y'all ...
Don't get me wrong. I do love the husband. He's my husband, after all. But I've moaned and groaned many times about how much it wigs me out to have someone else in the house all the time. I'm used to being here alone, quiet and alone. I like it. I need it. My heart of hearts is a solitary one 3/4 of the time. Even having the husband occupied back in his studio for hours at a time doesn't keep me from being aware there is another person in the house. The energy changes. I'm aware of his presence at all times. It's nerve wrecking. Sort of like a doctor being 'on call' and never knowing for sure just when that damned beeper 's gonna' go off. Ah well, the next five days are mine. And yes, I'm giggling about that lovely little fact.
The store's been open for eleven days now. While I can't say we've been very busy I can say we have had some business. When our newspaper article hits the press I'm sure it will pick up considerably. Spreading the word. I'm looking forward to the day when we're busy enough to hire someone to run the counter while Paul and I spend our time doing Reiki sessions all day. Or I'm doing readings. I'm looking forward to having other types of services like having a massage therapist or acupuncturist, etc. I'm looking forward to offering classes such as yoga or meditation or tai chi. I'm looking forward to the retail section of the store being full of more nice things and making lots of sales on a daily basis. I see it all in my mind's eye and I feel good about it. Even with the state of the economy and life being a bit chaotic now, I still feel very positive about our store and it's success. It's going to be wonderful.
Speaking of wonderful things ... I'm knitting up a lovely meditations stole to sell in the store. It's a delicate angora/silk lace weight yarn in a dusty lavender color. When it's finished I'm going to stitch little crystal beads on it. Yeah, there is a way to attach the beads while you are knitting but I didn't think about it until I'd already started. This particular on is a basic garter stitch on large needles. Creates the illusion of lace without the complication of actually knitting a real lace pattern.
But it's making me brave .....
I made a trip to Asheville to AC Moore Crafts and bought some other yarns for shawls/stoles. While I was there I found a book, Wrapped in Comfort by Alison Jeppson Hyde, which completely and totally snagged my soul. Holy schmoly! I am so hooked. The shawls are amazing. They are so delicate and feminine. I want one of each. Yes, I'm aware that's a rather hysterical statement coming from me. But believe me, these shawls are simply dreamy. Granted, I'm not quite ready to jump into knitting one up just yet but I've been on the net looking for the yarn for the one I do intend to make. Handmaiden Yarn. In my humble opinion, it ranks right up there with chocolate. It's nasty expensive, too. Fortunately the shawl I want to knit only requires one skein. Whew!
Making any one of them would gear me up for this frothy bit of yarnage ... Best of Interweave Knits. *Note image on cover.* I have the pattern in one of my issues of Interweave Knits. When I got that magazine I sat and stared at that shawl with my mouth hanging open. It's a beautiful piece of work. It was a vague, distant thought in my little brain that I would ever dare to attempt such an accomplishment as knitting up a lace shawl. Intimidating is an understatement. At the time, I was still only dreaming of making my sweater. Ya' know, I really think knitting that sweater caused something in my cranial cavity to snap loose. Half way through I was envisioning piles of sweaters, things with cables and fancy-pants stitches, big and snuggly afghans, socks and thick footies. And, yes, even daring to think of knitting lace. My knit-freak kicked in, or on, or whatever. Gah!
So, now I'm on the rampage of knitting prayer/meditation shawls/stoles for the store. I don't know that I'm going to be able to part with them after I knit them. Oy! That's a depressing thought. Maybe I'll use the Handmaiden yarns for ones for me and other yarns for the ones for the store. Yeah! Excellent. Cake and eat it, too.
Namaste y'all ...
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